Flatulent-Fuelled Granny Pat & The Diamond Meat Mob’s Revenge

Flatulent-Fuelled Granny Pat 

& The Diamond Meat Mob's Revenge

by S.J Harrison



Have you ever met a hero who can solve a crime with a pork pie, outrun a pigeon, and cause a sudden gust of wind with a single, well-timed… “performance?”

Meet Granny Pat. She’s not your average 70-something retiree. She’s a former supercop, a three-time World Pork Pie Tossing Champion, and the one woman who single-handedly brought down the notorious Diamond Meat Mob. But her latest adventure is her craziest yet, and it's a windy, wild ride that proves you should never underestimate a grandma.
​More Than Just a Funny Story 💨

​Beneath Granny Pat’s permed hair and questionable pickled-everything diet lies a brilliant mind. She's a master of creative problem-solving, whether it’s using her homemade "Super-Slick" lubricant to turn her creaky knees into a super-powered sprint, or deploying her "other talents" to disorient a whole gang of crooks.


​This book, "Flatulent-Fuelled Granny Pat & The Diamond Meat Mob’s Revenge," is a hilarious and action-packed tale that shows kids (and adults!) a few important lessons:
​You don’t have to be young to be a hero. Granny Pat proves that wisdom, experience, and a little bit of chaos can save the day.
​Teamwork is a secret weapon. When Granny and her mischievous grandkids, Max and Molly, team up with their surprisingly acrobatic cat, Mr. Tiddles, they become an unstoppable force.

​The most unique talent can be the most powerful. This story celebrates the wonderfully weird, reminding us that being different is a superpower.

​Imagine this: a cunning plan involving a pigeon with VR goggles, a stash of sausage rolls, and a daring rescue from a very smelly meat market. The Diamond Meat Mob thinks they've got the upper hand by kidnapping the twins, but they've never faced a foe quite like Granny Pat.

​Here’s a taste of the action from Chapter 10:
​Granny decided it was time to use her emergency weapon: Granny’s eyes blazed like twin searchlights as she rounded on the mob. Every bead of anger seemed to charge her inner energy. And then it happened. A low, rumbling growl from deep within her belly — a storm gathering strength. Her fury, honed from years of dealing with criminals who thought they were clever, amplified the effect. When she let it go, it wasn’t just a fart. It was a tactical blast, a gale-force wind powered by pure anger.


Ready for an Adventure?
​"Flatulent-Fuelled Granny Pat & The Diamond Meat Mob’s Revenge" is a book that will have you and your kids laughing from the very first page. It's a whimsical tribute to the power of family, the joy of a good giggle, and the fact that grandmas can be the most unexpected superheroes of all.

​Grab your copy today and join the fun!

​Find it on Amazon - Available to order worldwide on Amazon Prime

Or in Paerback from Waterstones 





​What's the funniest or most unexpected talent your hero has? Let me know in the comments below!

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